"Lady's Run me over and park on me! - 45"

"Lady's I am looking to break a Guinness worlds record, by being ran over by the most cars driven with the most beautiful woman in IL. If you want to run me over please leave me a message. Every time a woman runs me over and parks her car on me, she will have a picture taken of her standing on me for the records. If your the world record breaker driver, you may have you picture with your car on me in the world record book as the woman to break the run over record!"






Tempting. But how does his peen stay intact?

"Want a girl who would gain some weight - 29"

"I've always found it sexy to see a girl put on weight. I'm interesting in connecting with a girl who would be willing to put on 30 lbs or more. Would take you out to eat. Cook for you. Massage your feet while you eat ice cream or cheesecake. Worship each pound you put on."


I think every girl with an eating disorder just came in their pants.

"NO!!!!! I WILL NOT HAVE SEX WITH YOU !!!! - 36"

"What is with all the Women on CL just looking for sex????? I am not that kinda guy!!!!

I have gone out with 2 women from here and all the wanted to do was get me in bed..WTF????

What has this world come to?

should not be craigslist..it should be sexlist..

and if you are going to try to take me out to dinner.. you better send a pic...if you are looking for a easy guy..head over to the casual encounter page....I am not a slut...

I feel so used..........."




I usually don't bother including the pictures from these postings, but this was too good to pass up. Pleasepleasepleaseplease be real.

"neva done this b4, so lets c wuz good.."

"Ok so diz my forst time aight!!.. lol I'm str8 up down 2 earth person I have many great friends that truly appreciate my friendship bu yet I haven't met da special1.. I'm very outgoing I like going to bars n clubs bu I don mind staying a home w a love1 jst killing time, I'm realy independent in which I mean I have my own place n my own cars.. I really shouldn't be trying things like this bu O' watta hell.. lol ok ok so I kno diz important.. I'm 24ys old I'm 5' 7" I'm hispanic I'm 145lbs I Don't have problems meeting new ppl, I jst like trying out sum diff once in a While u kno???.. lol.... so wa u doin thiz weekend?.. wanna meet up?"


A str8 up down 2 earth person? Sounds like an oxymoron to me.

"Unfortunate flatulence problem"

"Morbidly obese web-toed underwear model with extra limb (you guess where?) who likes eating mayonnaise and raw garlic sandwiches seeks healthy girl without identifying scars - must have all her own teeth, recite alphabet backwards in Swahili and sweat freely and often, for romantic and passionate first date - NO Tongue. Must enjoy being bored & lonely. Your body shot gets mine by carrier pigeon return post."


LOLZ

"Conservative, Christian, ehtnic Hillbilly - 29"

"Hello. The headline says it all. I am conservative, a Christian, and an ethnic Hillbilly.

I an a 29 year old single white male ... I love country music ... I work with men who work in the sun all day, and develop "red" tans on their necks that are semi permanent. We commonly call each other "rednecks" with affection. I am a God fearing man, so please be right with God. This is a must. I do own a pickup truck, her name is Big Red.

I hold my conservative values close, and am a man of my principles. If you are a liberal who believes in killing babies, or wants to see gay marriage become legal, or are a devout obama lover, please pass me by your wasting your time.

Things I enjoy: Ridding my bike in the park, driving, watching movies, working on my truck, working on my computer, working with my tools, or just working general. I like good conversations, country fried potatoes, road trips that head south, Sarah Palin, playing with my cat Cletus, visiting my family, Ice tea on a hot day and hot tea on a cold day, The Irish, Church, and many other things."



As a liberal, killing babies is definitely one of my favorite past times. However, I'm still unclear about what "ethnic hillbilly" means, exactly. Anyone?

"May I See Your Boobs (covered or bare) in Pics or on Cam? - 30"

"Thank you for considering it. :)"



This is the most polite personal I've ever read.